Friday, 30 December 2011

Holy, Mouse Infestation!!

So you know how I moved into a new place a few months ago? Yeah...

Well, I found a place that was not only (seemingly) perfect for my family but also available immediately at a really great price, so of course I snatched it up. Well, for those reasons and because I was staying with hubby's sister and her FOUR children...All boys...while I house shopped and one week into living there I was seriously considering throwing myself out of the third story window. Seriously, I have had my own place since I was 18 and I cannot...I repeat CANNOT..stay with other people. I am weird like that. I don't even like sleeping over at my own mothers house. So anyways, for those reasons I took the place immediately. Of course I went to look at the place first and it seemed perfectly suited for my family and our needs. Let us review the pros and cons.

-Three large bedrooms so the kids can each have their own rooms (at our old apartment the baby slept in our room).
-My OWN washer and dryer (It was coin operated at out old place, 2.25$ per load..and trust me with two kids it adds up FAST).
-Large fenced in backyard (The yard at our old place was non-existent).
-Large baby barn for storage
-Very reasonable rent and security deposit

-No garbage bin so raccoons keep ripping the garbage open and throwing it all over my deck. Not fun.
-Infested with mice. Yeah. You heard me.

Apparently the landlord either didn't notice (and I find that hard to believe since the place was empty for a while and I am SURE there would have been droppings when he went in to get it ready for me to move in) or he simply omitted that little piece of information, but as I quickly discovered we were not alone. The very first time I had an encounter with a rodent was while I was home alone with the kiddos, while daddy was at work, about a week or two after moving in. I was sweeping the floor while the kids sat on the couch watching cartoons when I saw something out of the corner of my eye beside the shoe mat. I tiptoed over to inspect further and there. It. Was. A freakin' mouse, just chillin' inside my shoe. In my shoe! Needless, to say I screamed my head off and jumped up onto the couch, scaring the ever-loving shit out of my kids and causing them to both burst into tears. I realised I had to either catch the mouse or it would be roaming my house freely. "Stay on the couch until my Mommy's says, okay?" I ordered the kids. They both nodded their heads, eyes wide with fear. I grabbed a pair of hubby's old work boots and put them on. (When I told hubby about this later he laughed until he cried. "What were you gonna do step on it?" He asked. Uh, no, I just didn't want it to bite my toes, duh. *eye roll*). I looked around for something to trap it with and settled on my sons Lego box since it had a lid I could put on it. This all seemed totally reasonable at the time. Fear makes you do illogical things. Let me paint a picture for you: Me wearing a housecoat and size 11 work boots, trying to tiptoe (not an easy task in steel toes) around the house, with a Lego bin in my hands. The kids must have though I had really gone off the deep end this time. Well, I spent a good hour or two rooting through every closet, piece of clothing, under every bed, inside every cupboard. That little fucker was gone. I don't blame him, I screamed loud enough to wake the dead. After I calmed down a bit and my breathing was regular again I reasoned with myself that it was an old house, it had been empty for a while and it was totally understandable that a mouse would find his way inside out of the cold. I mean it was just one tiny mouse right? WRONG!

After that incident I was on hyper alert for mice. Suddenly the clues were everywhere. How did I not see the signs?! While watching a movie, hubby and I would hear them squeaking and rustling around from what sounded like behind the cupboards. After a few nights of this I was at my limit and made hubby investigate. After listening intently we decided that it definitely sounded like it was coming from behind the fridge. I got hubby to pull the fridge out and sure enough, this is what we found:

This is a mouse hole..
Those are mouse holes in case you were wondering. Like fuckin five of them! I almost died right there. Hubby, being a man, immediately ran for his pellet gun rifle. Like he was actually going to shoot a mouse. He camped out behind the fridge for a good hour with the gun aimed at the holes, trying to coax the little hellions out.Yeah, they never came out.

I emailed the landlord the next day and explained my findings and assumed he would take care of the situation. Well what does he do? Drops of one measly mouse trap. Just one. Ummm, I am no expert exterminator but one would assume that when there are, like, ten mouse holes in the very first place you look, you probably have more then one mouse. Well, we set the trap and snuggled up on the couch to watch a movie later that evening. We weren't even past the previews when SNAP! The friggin trap went off. Well, that was quick! Of course I sent hubby to investigate and sure enough we had bagged our self a huge mouse. It was still alive when we looked and I honestly felt really bad because it was caught right by its little pink nose. Hubby wanted to just leave it to die but I just couldn't bear to watch this little guy suffer so I ordered him to let it go in the field outside. He refused and said that it would just come back inside. Well, I was almost in tears at this point so hubby finally caved and just let it go outside. I am now sure that it ran right back in by whatever little hole it got in by in the first place, laughing all the way.

Gotcha, Sucka!!

 Later that night, your never going to believe this, when I went to bed I put my brand new 60$ purse beside the bed, as usual. Well, when I woke up in the middle of the night to grab my puffer out of my purse and reached down to pick it up I was left holding only the straps, no purse. The little bastards chewed the straps right off my freakin' purse!! Un-fuckin-believable! This kind of bullshit went on for another week or so. Well, fast forward to about seven mice later that we have caught. Lets just say I am not so soft hearted anymore. Now I sit there and giggle,  watching the little fuckers suffer. "Just DIE you little bastard, DIEEEEEEEEE." I called my landlord back to let him know that I didn't think one mouse trap was gonna cut it since I already caught seven with just one trap in like a matter of one week. What does he do next? Call an exterminator? Nope...That makes too much sense (actually I just think he is too cheap). No...He shows up at my door with a bottle of Rat Poisoning. Ummm, yeah, I have small children so I don't exactly feel comfortable scattering poison around my house. Plus, I read online that if you use rat poison they just die in the walls and shit. Not exactly the desired outcome. I was so pissed I called him back and told him to just bring me more traps. Honestly, if you want something done right you really do have to do it yourself.

So that was almost a week ago since the rat poison incident and we have still been averaging at about one mouse per night. We've been catching those fuckers left and right. Just last night while watching TV we saw one run out from behind the entertainment stand. Once again hubby grabs the pellet gun. WTF? Friggin' men. The thing kept poking his little nose out from the drawers of my entertainment stand over and over. I thought hubby was just waiting for a good shot, but when I gestured towards where it was peeking from he was just like "What? *Blank stare*. He didn't even see the fuckin' thing! Once again if you want something done...I snatched the gun from him and got into sniper position. I was NOT fuckin around anymore. Unless these little fuckers were gonna pay rent they gotta beat the feet. I already have enough mouths to feed. Well, I never did catch the mouse we saw that night so I know there is at LEAST one more mouse roaming around. Though there are probably wayyy more. I don't think I have to emphasize exactly how PISSED I am over this shit. I read online that mouse shit releases toxins that can affect your breathing. Well, since we moved in here my asthma's been acting up hella bad and both my kids, who have never really had breathing problems, are prescribed puffers. I initially thought this was because of winter being here and all the flu bugs and such floating around but now I am not so sure.

Anyways, I plan on emailing my landlord back and telling him either he calls an exterminator or I am going to be calling the Board of Health. I pay money to live here, I have small children, I am not a fuckin exterminator. It isn't my job to catch these nasty little creatures. If something doesn't get done I am going to have to move. Seriously, I am on a year lease and I am not putting up with this shit for a whole year. It is, for one, disgusting. Number two, it is a safety hazard. These fuckers obviously chew everything, judging by the wall behind my fridge. Well, if they are living in the walls what stops them from chewing on structural beams or wires? Nothing. How do I know my house isn't going to collapse as a result or burst into flames? I don't. Number three, I have kids and everyone knows that mice are filthy little, disease ridden animals. God forbid one bites my child and catch a disease or something. I would be out for blood . Anyways, I am going to give him until the end of the month to resolve this issue or I'm bringing out the big guns. In the meantime, I will definitely keep you all updated on this shitfest of a situation. So tell me...Have you ever had a problem with mice? How did you get rid of them? Any advice or tips?


  1. I am not a cat lover, but they do help with the mice. Oh hate mice, I feel bad for ya. Following back with GFC from Bacon Time. Happy New Year's Eve.

  2. Yeah, I would love to get a cat except I have asthma and I am allergic to them:( Thanks for stopping by though!!


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